Close Encounters
Lister's
P.O.V.
(Save
code 49821742)
"Good
morning, what would you like?"
"Bonjourno....erm.....gimme a fry-up!"
"English or continental?"
"English....with extra fried tomato."
"And what would you like to drink with that?"
"Lager....Wicked Strength.....already opened for....about half an hour."
The dispenser hums and clicks and after a few seconds, Lister's order pops
out of the dispenser.
He goes and sits down with it.
Lister wolfed down most of the meal in one go and made a start on the lager,
which tasted perfect after being left standing those extra few minutes. As
he finished the can, he tipped his head back to get those extra few drips
that are like sex as a teen, you only ever get them if you're lucky, but still
failed to get the last few drops, and so threw the can at the wall, where
it promptly crushed itself and dropped into the bin.
Lister high-fived
the air and went back to demolishing his meal when Holly came up on the viewscreen.
"Alright dude!"
"Hi Hol, how's it hanging?"
"Long and low.....well, it would be if I had one..."
"Hol, you got any good cures for hangovers?"
"Yeah, don't get drunk!"
"Ha ha, very funny....too late for that....Anyway, did you come in here
for a reason?"
"What? Oh, yea, we're getting a signal."
"What of?"
"I dunno, but it's certainly not Channel 5!"
"And you worked this out how? By cross-checking the frequencies and type
of data against our databanks on such things?"
"No" says Holly "I just know that if the Channel 5 signal can't
get less than 5 miles down the road without interference, we're unlikely to
get it out here 3,000,000 light years away."
"So what is it?"
Just then the intercom fizzed and Kryten said "I've not seen one before,
no-one has, but I'm guessing it's a white hole!"
Holly looked at the intercom box and said "A white hole?"
"Kryten, cut it out, man!" said Lister, not sure whether that was
residual time from their white hole incident a while back (that wasn't the
first time this had happened) or just Kryten pissing about with the intercom
system.
"So, about this signal we're getting......Is it from anyone we
know?"
"Not that I can tell, Lister, but it's consistent. It's probably being
relayed by some sort of local beacon, but I don't see any man-made beacon
within range."
"You're saying it's a natural beacon?"
Holly nodded his head.
"Something like a planet with the right atmospheric conditions?"
Holly nodded again.
"A planet with a livable, breathable atmosphere?"
Holly nodded his head one last time, then started to fade.
"I'll be right up to the cockpit, man!"
Lister gobbled the last of his food and even managed to get the last few drops
of lager from the can. Lister went over to the dispenser, ordered another
can and rushed to the cockpit.
Lister arrived
at the cockpit and looked around. Kryten and the Cat are at their stations,
but Rimmer is missing.
"What's the deal with this signal then?" Lister says, looking at
the Cat.
"I'm not sure, bud, but it's not good whatever it is! My nostril hairs
are shaking like implants in a plastic surgeon's surgery in San Fransisco.....during
an earthquake, bud!"
"And that's a bad thing?"
Click below to go to the Drive Room
This page Copyright © 2000 MURDER - The Misc Useful Red Dwarf Entertainment Resource