Close Encounters
Lister
in the Drive Room
(Save
code 02817391)
Lister watched
Rimmer leave the Drive Room, presumably to go take a nap. Rimmer had been
doing this often lately, something must have been troubling him.
"Y'know, I'm almost sorry for Rimmer" said Lister, forlornly "I'm
getting worse and worse...it's not that he doesn't deserve it, but hell, no-one
deserves to be dressed up like a baby like that, it's just not fair!"
"Oh shut up and have fun while you are" said the Cat, smiling. He
takes another picture from his pocket and hands it to Lister.
"Here's another copy, keep it. I've got a few more stored up 'just in
case' I need them."
"A few more? How many is a few?"
"About 5,000 or so, according to plastic percy"
"Ouch.....I hope that's all of them, I'd hate to find out that Rimmer
finds more of them around the ship!"
Cat stops for a moment and thinks about this. A grin begins to form on his
face, a plan is forming.....
"Actually, I think there was about 2,000 Kryten said, not 5,000, I keep
getting those two numbers mixed up!"
Cat got up from his chair and went off out the door.
"Where you goin', man?"
"Just got something to do, bud, I'll be about 1/2 hour!"
As Cat left, Kryten came in through the other door. He walked over to the
console and satdown.
"So, anything new, Kryters?"
"Nothing, sir, absolutely nothing. Not even a planet within our local
vicinity"
"I don't understand it, Holly found a signal, the Cat says there's definitely
something out there and the ship even says something is sending a signal.
Where could it be coming from?"
"Could it be possible that it's coming from inside the ship?"
"Nah, we did that storyline."
"When?"
"In the future...well, the past, it's the future to us, but it's documented
in the past. Here, man, take a look at these scripts!"
Lister hands Kryten a 1" floppy disk which he promptly inserts into a
hidden drive in his neck. A lot of whirring and beeping goes on, and the disk
pops out again.
"Oh dear, I didn't believe such things existed! That is truly bad news!"
"What is?"
"You dying!"
"Wait a minute, I die? I didn't read anything about me dying!"
"You haven't got to the end of Series 6 yet then?"
"No, I'm still on Series 3.....'if you don't punch in the access code,
those male sexual organs and everyone else's organs, sexual or otherwise,
will be scattered around the local planet's orbit'...hehe, I didn't know Rimmer
had it in him!"
"According to these scripts, we're at the middle of Series 3, just before
that happens.....perhaps we should make sure Holly has got rid of the bomb...."
"We can't, Kryten, because if we do we will change history."
"And look what happened when you did that in Series 7, You turned yourself
and Cat into cannibals!"
"I'd rather not know, Kryten! Anyway, I had a quick search through the
scripts, right up to Series 12, including the dismal film, and the computer
turned up some flimsy story about 'nanobots' or something"
"Nanobots? What have they got to do with signals? They're programmed
to perform repair work on my system, they've not even got the technology to
communicate to anything except themselves."
"Perhaps they robo-evolved!"
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